Friday, May 11, 2007

HARDER THAN IT SHOULD BE

Ever wonder why life seems harder than it should be? I do.

I talked with a friend whose divorce was finalized this week. We concurred: Life is hard. Marriage can be harder. Harder than it should be.

I had a drop-in counseling appointment with a mom of 4 in my office this week. All four kids have different fathers. She has a long list of medications and issues and fears and ..... She has a long list of regrets... dating all the way back to her own childhood. The longer she sat and cried and clenched her hands, the more I realized her life is hard. Harder than it should be.

Our church is in a weekend teaching series that is challenging every level of our being: spiritual, emotional, physical, financial, mental, relational, philosophical... etc. It's challenging us as a community and me in specific, to rethink again what I really think this thing we call life is all about. It's hard to think eternally. It's even harder to live eternally today. It's hard. Harder than it should be.

Some days as a father, life is hard. Some days I feel that way as a pastor. Some days I feel that way as a boss. Some days I feel that way as an athlete, a mentor, a neighbor, a husband, a home owner, a friend, a seminary student, a ... well a lot of roles. It's hard to be me without letting others down. It's just plain hard. Harder than it should be.

This week, while reading Hosea, I ran across this small poetic statement if chapter 4, verse 16:

The Israelites are stubborn, like a stubborn heifer.
How then can the LORD pasture them like lambs in a meadow?

You know what that verse says to me? It says that God wants to feed us and provide for us and protect us like lambs in a meadow. But he can't.

You know why he can't? My own stubborn rebellious heart.

Know what that does? It makes life hard. Harder than it should be.

I wonder: How much of life's difficulty is not brought on by the desire of God, but instead is necessitated by the stubbornness of his children?

I wonder: How much longer Jesus will wait to return? Sometimes, when life is hard- Harder than it should be- I ask Jesus to come. Now. So life can become as it was intended to be and so he can feed us like he desires instead of as he must.... like lambs in a meadow.

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San Diego, CA
Husband. Dad. Jesus Follower. Friend. Learner. Athlete. Soccer coach. Reader. Builder. Dreamer. Pastor. Communicator. Knucklehead.

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