Wednesday, October 19, 2011

RETREAT PLANNING- WHY BOTHER

At the last NYWC in San Diego, myself and Nate Rice and Matt McGill hosted a panel discussion entitled "Retreat Planning 101" and in it, we discussed the what, when, where, how and such of planning your own retreat verses just using the already done program of a retreat center who runs their own camps and subcontracts out spaces to groups.

We decided to do a brief overview and then we selected on person from the audience who had a retreat to plan and we used him as a guinea pig and tried to apply the basic retreat planning process to his one retreat.  That gave us an immediate way to make it practical and a fun way to help someone out.

But before we dug in, we started asking the basic question:  "Why bother?"  I mean really, think about it.  No one has extra time or money these days and planning your own retreat will require both.  Volunteers will have to take time off work, families will have to find room in their budget for the retreat expenses, the work load of the one(s) planning the retreat just went sky high, and the list could go on.  If you were trying to make your life easier or not put pressure on the budget of any family, then you would surely NOT plan a retreat at all.  So again, "Why bother?" Are retreats stills worth it?

I asked myself this question again this week as I'm planning a retreat with our students this weekend.  It's our annual fall retreat and the guys are going to the desert about an hour east of us and the girls are going to the beach at Carlsbad about an hour north of us.  But while both trips have promising experiences laid out, both trips have also already proven to be a lot of work and a financial hardship for families and even my own church budget. We're not planning a $300 weekend, but still... everything ads up when I'm calling students and writing on Facebook walls and trying to convince all kinds of people that it will be worth the sacrifice of time and money, I find myself again wondering... am I just trying to convince myself it will be awesome?  Maybe the retreat model is dead for a season and I should quit planning stuff like this.

So for what it's worth, here's 3 reasons I think planning a retreat is worth it.  Despite the fact that my week is harder than normal and my weekend waaaay busier, here's why I would still do it again:

GET AWAY & GET OUT OF TOWN FACTOR.  There is no changing it.  When you get away, the mindset is different.  There's anticipation in the air.  Students listen different. Adults engage different.  I could paint the whole building every weekend and change decor into some new theme, and it still wouldn't compete with the power of a new environment off our church campus.  When ever we get out of the normal space and into a new one, God meets us there.  Maybe he gets bored just like we do with monotony. Retreats break that up.  Retreats are powerful ethos changers.

BONDING.  There is nothing that can promote bonding like a shared experience.  Go on a road trip.  Build a bonfire.  Have something break and something go ridiculously wrong.  All of it adds up to a memory that again, will always trump whatever stuff happens in our church on Sunday. Getting away creates a community in ways that staying at home simply can't compete with.  It's true of family vacations. It's true of student retreats too.

LIFE CHANGE.  I know it's cliche to think that when we get away, people connect with God. This truth has gotten a bad rap actually because many times the results are hyped up and short lived.  But the flip side of this coin outweighs this possibility every time.  The fact of the matter is when we take a risk and pour into one another and God like we do when we go on retreats, God does great things.  Sure, you could argue that if we did that each time we met at home, God would do that there too.  It is true God is not spatially impaired.  But you'd also be arguing against reality as well.  The truth is normal is normal.  If you want the abnormal to occur, you have to take a risk and get abnormal.  Retreats set up amazing opportunities where God constantly and consistently works in the lives of those who join God in the abnormal experiences a weekend or weeklong retreat lends itself too.

So go ahead, work hard, pull out your hair, stress over the money, beg spoiled students to go with you, take a risk, trust God, and remind yourself that it's all worth it.  Every minute and every penny.  Retreats are a great investment of both.  Give it 2 weeks.  It will all be worth it.  Give it 2 years and it will definitely prove to be worth it.

4 comments:

Matthew,  8:57 AM  

I promised to comment when I was able so here it is. I have a pretty good idea from conversations what your upcoming retreats will be like and know that they have some pretty BIG stuff happening. From my experience the BIG retreat is no more or less effective than the small "retreat." BIG gets more hype but small can be more real.

Last year I attempted an actual-cost 24 hour getaway. One was for the guys and one was for the girls. The girls' getaway was focused on identity. They went to San Francisco for Friday evening and learned about the sex industry in the city. They then went out and handed out hygiene kits to girls on the street (apparently guys don't care for a kit with tampons in it.). They also went and prayed against known brothels. Afterwards, we debriefed the ways the women they met are treated and how they view themselves. They spent Saturday looking at the ways they view themselves and how girls around them view themselves and what prevents them from seeing themselves as treasures.

At the same time, the guys went to a farm to help rebuild a barn, beginning by removing layers of old poop. They intermittently looked at the story of Nehemiah and the things he faced as he chose to rebuild Jerusalem's walls. Through their sweat and hard work (in pouring rain, no less), they were called to be the kind of people who rebuilt things and people in this world instead of tearing them down.

For retreats just for my group, I am finding the 24-hour getaway to be both effective and less time-consuming in preparation and marketing. When people sign up I put a cap on the cost, promising it will not cost any more than that and then they paid when I picked them up. I believe both groups paid about $15 for this awesome 24 hour getaway.

brian c. berry 9:14 AM  

thanks Matthew. I love the barn thing. Maybe I need to tell my church someone needs to let us work on their house and we'll study Nehemiah on their roof. But u did the loaves and fishes thing with anything for $15 that involved feeding people, gas, and ministry supplies. U da man. Loved hanging with you at Recess.

Humphreys,  3:39 PM  

The key to the $15 was donated gas and a small enough group that they were able to stay in homes. The host families did the shopping. I was willing to eat a little bit of the ministry supply costs, like a dart gun, which had future uses, too. My guess is you could pull it off for $30, though.

If we're going to work on a roof, I'd jump to Mark 2 and the friends of the paralytic. I would simply ask what does it take to be the kind of person who goes onto someone else's roof and cuts a hole out and lowers someone down so they can be healed. We get to spend the weekend cleaning up THEIR mess and talking about what it means to be that kind of friend.

I enjoyed hanging with you, too. I'm going to be brainstorming our spring getaways in a couple weeks. Let me know if you want to join in.

adam mclane 10:44 PM  

I'm hoping to fall in love with the idea of a retreat this weekend.

One thing is for sure, you're a master planner. Holy crap you have lists! I mean... actual lists. Woozers.

As a dude who infamously wrote "I Kissed Retreats Goodbye" and got hate mail, literal hate mail with photocopied KJV bible verses cut out and filing envelopes... I hope I'll be kissing retreat hello.

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Husband. Dad. Jesus Follower. Friend. Learner. Athlete. Soccer coach. Reader. Builder. Dreamer. Pastor. Communicator. Knucklehead.

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