WHAT I LEARNED ABOUT NEW YORK IN PICTURES

Welp, I've made my first trip to New York and to New York City.  I had to come without Shannon due to the craziness of 5 children and the added needs of our newest recruits, but we are celebrating our 15 year anniversary in June and she thinks we should return.  She thinks this a lot.  Maybe I can sell a kid or something and bring her back with me so we can explore some more together.

Anyway, here's what I'm learning in my 2 days of being a tourist and preparing for my 15 year anniversary evidently:

I KID YOU NOT... SWATCH IS STILL IN BUSINESS.  Virgin Mobile is closing, but Swatch Watch is still going strong like it's 1985.  Wow.

 

THERE IS A HARD ROCK CAFE IN EVERY MAJOR CITY IN THE WORLD.  And, there's enough memorabilia to fill 500 more evidently.  

HARD ROCK CAFE BELIEVES ALL "RELIGIONS" REALLY ARE THE SAME.... Elvis, Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed, all were sharing the same message.  Someone needs a history lesson.

YOU DON'T WANT A CAR IN NYC, cuz parking sucks so bad they stack em.

 

MACYS HAS BEEN IN NY SO LONG THEY HAVE WOODEN ESCALATORS.  Yep, like hardwood floor that moves.  Crazy nuts.  The wood worker in me so dug it.

TIME SQUARE HAS A HUGE ELECTRIC BILL... so much so that it could rival Vegas and I'm convinced- power the entire state of Montana.   Standing in the middle of the night feels like mid day there's so many massive lit up signs selling everything from food to movies to bras to news.

THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING AT NIGHT IS COOL.  You should see it then.  It's open til 2am.  You should NOT buy the lame-helicopter-pseudo-video-star-tours-look-a-like-thingamajig they are going to try and sell you.  It's great if you're 8.  After that, skip it.  My lovely friend Chuck Bomar told me this in a text 5 minutes AFTER we bought out tickets.  I'm saving you the pain.  Here's the pictures that prove the view from the top is so worth it though.

 

NYPD COPS ARE BORED.   They have signs everywhere saying they are watching you with video surveillance cameras and they are standing on virtually every street corner and if you go to the top of the Empire State Building, they are so bored they'll come buzz the tower and shine their lights and jack with the people for a photo op just for fun.  They did it twice while I was on the 86th floor.  Bored cops are fun.

CABS, CABS, CABS.  If you move to Manhattan, do not buy a yellow car.  DO NOT.  unless you like being whistled and yelled at.  Then rock on.